Friday, March 4, 2011

When the adrenaline rush comes to an end... another crash!

It's starting to sink in. I very well could have died on Tuesday. If it weren't for God and His protection I could be dead right now, instead of sitting here snuggly under my soft and warm fleece blanket.

I have been on an adrenaline rush ever since the accident. I've been in survivor mode... it's what I do when faced with major events in my life, it's what I've always done and it's all I know how to do. I was amazingly calm after the wreck and since then have just been doing everything I need to do - going to the chiropractor, working, getting a rental car, car shopping, buying a new car, getting everything out of my truck, putting new plates on, sorting through all the stuff that was in my truck, going to my counseling appointment, washing the blanket and canvas grocery bags I had in my truck as there was glass everywhere. There are insurance papers I got in the mail today that I need to fill out, but just can't cope with it tonight. I feel like I haven't had time to breathe since Tuesday morning.

I've been doing a lot of thinking since the accident. I realize that life is fragile and that none of us are guaranteed tomorrow. God has all of our days numbered and when our time on earth is done, He will take us home. He could have taken me over 20 years ago when I had major surgery, He could have taken me when I rolled my truck, He could take me tonight in my sleep... when it is MY time, I will go home to be with the Lord. But in the meantime He has me on this earth for a purpose. He still has work for me to do.

I was in such a hurry on Tuesday... thinking about getting to the dentist and not paying attention to the moment - which is why I rolled my truck. I really need to live in the moment and take each moment that God gives me and look for the opportunities He has for me in that moment. The name of this blog is Running the Race to the Finish... in a race, if all I think about is the finish line and don't pay attention to every step I take, I will fall and never make it to the finish. And, it's not just about running races... it's about living life with the goal of finishing well. Part of finishing well is living in the moment and seeing what God has for me to do in that moment. As long as God gives me breath, I want to serve Him with all I do.

For tonight... I need to take care of me. This probably means having a good cry. It will also mean having some time to just talk to God and thank Him for all He's blessed me with. And, lastly it will also mean just taking some time to relax and breathe.

Thanks for sharing in my journey,


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