Wednesday, October 3, 2012

A Little Trust Goes a Long Way

I just had to share this neat little thing.  I was not sure what I was going to do with Buddy when I went on my trip to Colorado. As much as I would LOVE to take him, I don't think it's the best thing for him. A college girl from my church has agreed to take care of him. She is a wonderful, responsible young lady who I know will give Buddy plenty of love and affection. I can rest assured knowing my baby will be well taken care of.

Thanks God, for showing me how You care for even the little things!

Continuing to learn to trust,


Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Trust - Colorado Here I Come!

When I need to process, one of the best things for me to do is to write. So, write I will! I was talking to a friend the other day about some issues and she brought up a very good point... that I have a hard time trusting God because so many people in my life have let me down. Now, if you are reading this, chances are you are one of my good friends or family members who have NOT let me down and you know I love you and hold you close to my heart. But, you also know that many people close to me in my life have let me down in some pretty major ways. My friend pointed out that this is probably why I live in fear and don't completely trust.

Another thing came up Sunday in Sunday School class. Matt, my friend, pastor (pastoral intern??), small group leader, made a comment that really struck my heart, "If we think of ourselves as a horrible wretch of a person who can never be good enough no matter how hard we try, then we will continue to try harder to be good enough and always come up short.  But, if we think of ourselves as a horrible wretch of a person who has been redeemed, then our actions will flow out of our redemption." I've lived a big portion of my life thinking of myself as a horrible wretch of a person... partially because that is the lie I was told by people that were supposed to love me.

So, how do these two things relate? They've been brought together as I've been processing whether or not to take a trip to Colorado next month to see my Aunt and family as well as a close friend who lives there. A part of me is scared - scared to leave the comfort of my home, scared that my car might break down on the Interstate, scared that I will have an accident on the trip. So, if I go on the trip and something bad happens, then I will think, "Ugh - what did I do to deserve this?" "What kind of wretched person am I to have had this happen to me?"

I've realized that I'm living in fear instead of just trusting. 1 John 4:18 says, "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love." I should not be living my life with this kind of fear. I should not be afraid to take a vacation because something MIGHT happen. Guess what, Sherri? You could get in an accident driving to work! Your car could break down driving to the grocery store! And, if one of these "terrible" things happens it is NOT because I'm some horrible wretched person - it's because life happens.

Life is short - God has shown that to me time and time again as I've seen people far too young pass away. I will not have my Aunt, Uncle, and cousins here forever. I will not have my friends here forever. None of us is promised tomorrow so I need to live today in trust, not in fear! This fear has had a grip on my heart and kept me from living for far too long. I will not let it rob me of a chance to see my family... my Aunt who has been more of a mom to me than I have ever had. I will not let it rob me anymore.

Barring bad weather preventing me from taking this trip, I am going - if something happens, it happens. God will still be God, He will still be on His throne, I will still be a redeemed Daughter of the Living God and He WILL take care of me because He loves me.

Learning to Trust,


Sunday, September 30, 2012

"Embracing the Suck"

I spent a good portion of yesterday reading James and writing it out in a notebook to carry with me to work on memorizing it. James 1:2-3 says, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance."  My good friend, pastor, and big brother, who happens to be younger than me, told me what his Lieutenant told him once: "Embrace the suck." I don't know Gabe's Lieutenant, I don't know if he's a believer. I don't know where or why he came up with the phrase "Embrace the suck." but I think James 1:2-3 gives us the same advice. Not only are we to embrace it, we are to consider it pure joy.

As I sit here typing these words, there are tears streaming down my face. Life has been full of hurt and disappointment lately. Life has not been going the way I would plan it out if I was in control. But, God is God and I am not and all I can do right now is hold on to the truth of His Word. He promises that the trials and testing of my faith will develop perseverance. James goes on to say in verse 4, "Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." So, if I have to go through the "suck" in order to be mature and complete then I will "Embrace the suck" no matter how hard it is. And, I can do so with full confidence in God's Word and God's Promises... and even with tears streaming down my face, a heart that is full of pain... that is enough.

One of my favorite songs is by Pam Thum and it's called "Life is Hard (God is Good)" These are the lyrics:

You turn the key
Then close the door behind you
Drop your bags on the floor
You reach for the light
But there's darkness deep inside
And you can't take it anymore

'Cause sometimes living takes the life out of you
And sometimes living is all you can do

Life is hard, the world is cold
We're barely young and then we're old
But every falling tear is always understood
Yes, life is hard, but God is good

You start to cry
'Cause you've been strong for so long
And that's not how you feel
You try to pray
But there's nothing left to say
So you just quietly kneel

In the silence of all that you face
God will give you His mercy and grace

Jesus never said
It was an easy road to travel
He only said that you would never be alone
So when your last thread of hope
Begins to come unraveled
Don't give up, He walks beside you
On this journey home and He knows

Life is hard, the world is cold
We're barely young and then we're old
But every falling tear is always understood
Yes, life is hard, but God is good

You can listen to it here...

Holding On,