Saturday, October 13, 2012

Coming Out of the Closet (sort of speak)


Why is it in our society that admitting to having depression, anxiety, eating disorder - or any such mental health issue - seems a bit like coming out of the closet? According to the World Health Association: "Depression affects more than 350 million people of all ages, in all communities, and is a significant contributor to the global burden of disease. Although there are known effective treatments for depression, access to treatment is a problem in most countries and in some countries fewer than 10% of those who need it receive such treatment."  I read this statistic and wondered why people don't receive the treatment they need. I honestly believe that one reason is that people hide. There is a certain stigma that our society attaches to these such problems. If someone has cancer or heart disease they don't hide it, they tell people, they ask for help, they aren't blamed or seen as weak or as less of a person or a bad Christian because of their illness.


Today marks the end of Mental Health Awareness Week. I didn't even know it was this week until Thursday. I haven't exactly hidden my struggles. I have been fairly open. But, I have never come right out and said it -
 I suffer with depression, anxiety, and an eating disorder. 

I've opened up to some people about it and in some cases received great support. In other cases I received strange looks and comments such as, "You just need more Jesus." or "You just need to CHOOSE to have a different attitude." Now, I am first and foremost a Christian. I believe in the power of prayer and I believe that God can heal. But, just take a quick read in the book of Psalms. If David were alive today he would probably be diagnosed with clinical depression. He dealt with a lot of emotions. Psalm 55: 2 "hear me and answer me. My thoughts trouble me and I am distraught." Psalm 8:1 "Why, O Lord, do you stand far off? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble." Psalm 13:1-2 "How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide  your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me?" Yes, it is David who said these things - David who was also called a man after God's own heart. A great book that I would HIGHLY recommend reading is The Cry of the Soul: How Our Emotions Reveal Our Deepest Questions About God by Dan Allender and Tremper Longman

It being Mental Health Awareness Week in addition to a very disturbing article on cnn.com yesterday are what led me to write this post.  The link to the article is here: http://www.cnn.com/2012/10/12/world/americas/canada-teen-bullying/index.html?hpt=hp_c1 The young lady in this article dealt with bullying, which is another issue, but often, as in this case led to major anxiety, depression and panic disorder. She left a chilling youtube video and her body was later found - she committed suicide.

All of this has got me to thinking. I'm doing fairly well right now. I am seeing a counselor and take medication as needed. But it bothers me that I have been somewhat "forced" into hiding because of societal stigmas and some thoughtless reactions from well-meaning people. I want to "come out" because I think it is essential that others know if they are suffering they do not need to suffer in silence. I want anyone reading this to know that you are not alone... I am here. If you don't want to talk to me, that's fine, but talk to someone. I want you to know that you don't have to suffer in silence. Please don't wait until it's too late. Don't stuff those feelings inside and keep them to yourself. First and foremost reach out to God - He is ALWAYS there. But, don't be afraid to reach out to your friends. "Come out of the closet" with me - be bold, be brave. It is not a sign of weakness to get counseling. There are a lot of great counseling services out there. Don't allow the stigma that society puts on mental health issues keep you from getting help. It doesn't mean you are weak, it doesn't make you less of a person, it doesn't make you a bad Christian, IT IS OK to NOT be OK!















Sherri

Monday, October 8, 2012

Amazed - simply amazed!

I am sitting here tonight in utter and complete amazement at how incredibly AWESOME our God is!

When I got up this morning my car didn't start. It was 5 a.m. and I didn't know what to do. I called a friend from church and her and her husband came over. He said it didn't sound like battery, but we tried jumping it. That didn't work and he said it sounded like the fuel pump. Anyway, they "happened" to have an extra vehicle I could use to get to work.

I had a 30 minute drive ahead of me and started out in my "default mode"... "What did I do to deserve this?" However, I didn't camp out there like I would in the past. I quickly started thinking and processing everything. I remembered what the speaker at church said yesterday about believing and trusting that God loves me and desires to care for me. I also thought about his first point about realizing the support you have around you. The family of God came to my rescue, even at 5 a.m. I was challenged all day to not just say I'm a Christian but to BE one - which meant not worrying incessantly about what was wrong with my car, but just resting and trusting that God loves me and He will take care of me. I thought about what I wrestled with last week regarding trust and fear and realized this was a perfect time for me to trust God and not be afraid!

I've been challenged lately about where my security lies and realizing that it lies in God and God alone. My car could completely die, I could lose my job, I could lose the roof over my head, I could lose my friends, I could lose the love of my life (OK - hitting close to home now)... BUT - the point is that I could lose anything at all on this earth but I will still be COMPLETELY SECURE in God's love, mercy, and grace. I can COMPLETELY TRUST GOD WITH EVERYTHING!

I was thinking about this on my drive home and this song came on the radio: One Thing Remains by Kristian Stanfill. You can listen here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QYCJ8EvkGCs

These are the lyrics: 

Your love never fails, never gives up
Never runs out on me

Higher than the mountains that I face
Stronger than the power of the grave
Constant in the trial and the change
One thing remains

On and on and on and on it goes
It overwhelms and satisfies my soul
And I never, ever, have to be afraid
One thing remains

Your love never fails, never gives up
Never runs out on me

In death, in life
I'm confident and covered by the power of Your great love
My debt is paid
There's nothing that can separate my heart from Your great love

Publishing: (c) 2010 Bethel Music Publishing (ASCAP) / Christajoy Music (BMI) (Admin. by Bethel Music Publishing) / Mercy Vineyard Publishing (ASCAP)
Writing: Brian Johnson, Christa Black Gifford and Jeremy Riddle


I love that line, "And I never, ever have to be afraid One thing remains."

Clinging to that ONE THING,

Sherri

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Following Hard After Jesus

I woke up this morning after a fitful and headache-filled night of sleep. I woke up at 1 a.m. with a terrible headache. I took some ibuprofen and headed back to bed. I woke up several times in the night still battling the headache and woke up with my head pounding. All I wanted to do was curl up on the couch with Buddy and a blanket with my eyes closed and a heat pack on my head. But it was Sunday morning - my favorite time of the week. I love gathering together with my brothers and sisters in Christ and worshiping our Father together. I love listening to God's Word being taught knowing that God uses His Word to speak to me when I listen with a receptive heart. I know there are times when we are sick and need to stay home, but this morning I strongly felt I needed to go no matter how much my head was throbbing. So, I took some more medication and made myself an iced coffee and took off for church.

I walked in and was greeted with hugs from sweet girls and had good conversation with friends before the service. I was blessed by our time of worship - I can't wait for Heaven when we will be singing praises to God for all of eternity. He is truly worthy of all my praise and I just love to sing to Him. It is such a sweet time where I personally really connect to the heart of my Heavenly Father.

It was Missions Sunday today and a representative from our church camp gave a short talk and a leader from a mission organization which supports Pastors in their native land gave the message. I was greatly challenged by both but want to share what Ryan, the camp representative shared with us as it challenged my heart.

Ryan had 4 points from Hebrews 12:1-3:

  • Realize the support you have built around you - the family of God.
  • Throw off all that hinders you: sin, distraction, worry, stress, and more.
  • Believe and trust that God simply loves you and desires to care for you.
  • Follow with intention hard after Jesus.
He challenged us to not just say we are a Christian, but to be a Christian. God has really been working in my life lately. His Spirit has been working in my heart and in changing my behavior. I have seen clear evidence of the Spirit's work in my life and others have noticed too. My boss at work made a comment the other day that he was proud of the way I had handled a situation. He noticed a difference in how I had handled the same situation in the past. I can honestly only attribute it to the Spirit's work and that I have been seeking to "Follow hard after Jesus". I really like that phrase and it stuck with me. 

We ended the service with a song that has been such a blessing to me when I've heard it on the radio. It was a sweet time of worship, hearing from God, and fellowship with my Family. I'm so thankful I didn't curl up on the couch like I wanted to this morning.

10,000 Reasons - Matt Redman: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ll9jgD565TU

[Chorus]
Bless the Lord, O my soul
O my soul
Worship His holy name
Sing like never before
O my soul
I'll worship Your holy name

The sun comes up, it's a new day dawning
It's time to sing Your song again
Whatever may pass, and whatever lies before me
Let me be singing when the evening comes

[Chorus]
Bless the Lord, O my soul
O my soul
Worship His holy name
Sing like never before
O my soul
I'll worship Your holy name

You're rich in love, and You're slow to anger
Your name is great, and Your heart is kind
For all Your goodness I will keep on singing
Ten thousand reasons for my heart to find

[Chorus]
Bless the Lord, O my soul
O my soul
Worship His holy name
Sing like never before
O my soul
I'll worship Your holy name

And on that day when my strength is failing
The end draws near and my time has come
Still my soul will sing Your praise unending
Ten thousand years and then forevermore

[Chorus x2]
Bless the Lord, O my soul
O my soul
Worship His holy name
Sing like never before
O my soul
I'll worship Your holy name

Jesus, I'll worship Your holy name
Lord, I'll worship Your holy name

Sing like never before
O my soul
I'll worship Your holy name
Jesus, I'll worship Your holy name
I'll worship Your holy name